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Climbing Up

As I the title states I am finally trying to climb up the hill. I rolled down pretty rough and pretty far even though it does not seem like it. I have to say I have been pretty impressed with myself on how I did not completely fall apart but I still fell. Well I think I am finally climbing the hill and once I am at the top I'll be good again. I think the main reason is I have to think of work when I am at work. Which kinda prevents my mind from going hay wire.

Yesterday I was a little down after work because I just wanted to see someone and forget about the day, even though it was not that bad, and needed to relax. Once at home it was extremely quite and that did not help the situation. I made food sat down and turned on the T.V. to what ever stuff was on. As I sat there in my self loathing letting my mind go crazy and started going stir crazy. What was I going to do but sleep. The crappy thing the last 3 weeks have been a period of little sleep and waking up to thinking. Last night was a different set up. I slept the whole night through with plenty dreams of work. Ohhh how I love work dreams... they are sooooo fun...

Anyways upon waking up today I just thought I really need to move on there is a lot of items I still need to do and lessons I need to learn. It might not be the worse that I am not in relationship. Yes, it has been a long time where I have been in actual one, one that is actually labeled. The fact is even when I am in a claimed one, it seems like I suck at it really really bad. Hopefully one day I learn because I really do want to succeed at that part of life, eventually.

Anyways today is a new day, I am alive, I have a lot going for me and yet several challenges that I need to over come. That is what life is, completing challenges, reaping the benefits and learning the lessons. Must of the time there are no physical benefits but the lessons seem pretty worth it.

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