One Day to Another

So, I am at the coffee shop again for my less distraction then home studying time. Also it could be an excuse to get good coffee. Anyways off the philosophical part of my regular writings. Today, I meet up with one of my friends who has helped me through some large problems. We are talking about our friends and our ex's and what we have done. The conversation came up that I need to get away from the girls I have been going after. These girls are just not the ones I should go for. The fact is, he is right. He continued with the conversation stating I need to find a girl who is in college or something close to me stop going after the girls who are going "no where." The more and more I think about that through out the day the more I agree. I think one of the biggest parts to this equation is the "what if's" in life. Such as what if I am with a girl and the what if occurs that a child gets involved in the situation. Knowing that most of my relationship problems

So as my last post had indicated, I have had a problem with a rut that has been plaguing me. I believe I know what the cause of this plague is, but I am still trying to find away out of it. As expressed in post on here and Facebook, one of doing this would be to pack it up and leave the area and find a new location. This idea sounds like a great idea but it can't be done at the current time. So with that said I have been trying to find an antidote to this problem, how can I get away from this constant bombardment of infection that can cause me to alter my current behavior into one of displeasure and the wanting to run to the comfort of my room. how can I remove my self from the cancer. The only thing I could think of doing is by letting myself go and understanding that dwelling and being affected by what I see is doing more damage then just accepting it. I know that I will always feel that pain that I do receive when ever I see the brew mix together, but I need to learn to let go,

I am slowly finding that the changes that I have been striving for have not come. The changes that do occur do not affect the situation as I hoped they would. The last couple of months have been some of the most stressful days I have ever had to endure, yet the only big change to come is that I should be graduating in December. That one change well be the highlight of the last two years, besides a huge life goal. The only problem is, it seems that besides the stress that I have to go through to make sure this accomplished, I feel that this goal is overlooked by the daily stuff I have to go through. These pains and aches slowly diminishing me and not allowing my scares to scab over. How can one fully move on when the environment they are in does not allow those scares to heal? How can one one truly look forward when their view is constantly blocked by those who cause the pain? How can one listen to embraceable words when the meaning of them is altered the minute the pain causer arrives