Skip to main content

Climbing Up

As I the title states I am finally trying to climb up the hill. I rolled down pretty rough and pretty far even though it does not seem like it. I have to say I have been pretty impressed with myself on how I did not completely fall apart but I still fell. Well I think I am finally climbing the hill and once I am at the top I'll be good again. I think the main reason is I have to think of work when I am at work. Which kinda prevents my mind from going hay wire.

Yesterday I was a little down after work because I just wanted to see someone and forget about the day, even though it was not that bad, and needed to relax. Once at home it was extremely quite and that did not help the situation. I made food sat down and turned on the T.V. to what ever stuff was on. As I sat there in my self loathing letting my mind go crazy and started going stir crazy. What was I going to do but sleep. The crappy thing the last 3 weeks have been a period of little sleep and waking up to thinking. Last night was a different set up. I slept the whole night through with plenty dreams of work. Ohhh how I love work dreams... they are sooooo fun...

Anyways upon waking up today I just thought I really need to move on there is a lot of items I still need to do and lessons I need to learn. It might not be the worse that I am not in relationship. Yes, it has been a long time where I have been in actual one, one that is actually labeled. The fact is even when I am in a claimed one, it seems like I suck at it really really bad. Hopefully one day I learn because I really do want to succeed at that part of life, eventually.

Anyways today is a new day, I am alive, I have a lot going for me and yet several challenges that I need to over come. That is what life is, completing challenges, reaping the benefits and learning the lessons. Must of the time there are no physical benefits but the lessons seem pretty worth it.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

When view through a window looks bad look through another.

In yesterdays post I talked about the amount of stress that I am placing myself in and stretching myself so thin that I am actual feeling a real effect of it. I began to look at everything that I am doing and the hell that I am placing myself into which a very bad situation, one that could place my whole future in a hell. I am seeing that because I am trying to do so many things that I am actually being very shellfish and not doing the right thing. I have so much that is riding on me and yes I need to have fun, but I also need to remember there are other things that should be holding precedence over. Its time to get thing straight and see there is a definitive path in which I must follow to make sure my future at hand, the way it may happen won't be changed because of poor choices on my part. Its time to close one window, and begin to look out another to see a new view, picture, hope for the future.
Post a Comment
Read more

2014 Goals, ready set go!

As I stated in the last post of 2013 I was going to put the infamous goals to complete in 2014 and here it is. Get to 200 pounds fit. Start the process to get into Search and Rescue Finish 3 large projects on the house Save up 7 percent of pay Get back into photograph I have some what of an idea of how I am going to accomplish this goals. I know every goal is possible and easily attainable, I just have to keep up with it at all times. I am pretty sure the hardest one is getting to 200 pounds fit. The second one, process of getting into search and rescue, may take longer then one year, but I really do want push for this.  There are other goals, or dreams that I wish to accomplish but they should not be placed on the list due to the fact they may not be attainable in a set time period. I well strive for those goals much as I can in hopes to reaching them I know people make goals and hope for them, but only hold them for so long. I try as hard as I possible can to ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Travel of the mind

Over the past 3 years I have been obsessed with travel movies, travel books, but most of all imagining the places I can go. I don't believe I have ever been in such a wanting of something then the ability to get up and travel the world, see new things, enter a world of others. I think the main reason for this is that I believe it will help me find my self. Learn from others to lighten the dark corners of my life. Understand the true human spirit and why we act and do what we do. It was around three years ago when I got to see Europe and explore two counties full of culture and new ways to light up my life. The sad thing it took almost three years to realize it because my eyes were covered by a blanket known as a fake relationship. I luckily didn't forget the sights, the food, and the people that I got to interact with. I don't believe I will ever forget those item now because it means so much. I am so very thankful that I was given that opportunity to see Germany and Italy....
Post a Comment
Read more