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Rough time

So the last couple weeks should have not been so rough, but it sure has been. First thing that happened was some unexpected problems with the house. This issue has made it extremely hard and then other stuff occurred that made it even worse. I found out that I had to do some test for my mid probation, but had no idea that it was the next day. I passed two of the test but did not pass the third. This has put a lot of stress on me on top of what I have already gained. At first I thought it was done, I was going to get fired. I still get to retake the test, even though I should have passed immediately. So I have been practicing so I pass the test. Anyways all this stress and no one to really talk to has shot down some confidence and weakened my stance. This is something that I really can't have. The career I have dose not allow, my personality does not allow it and frankly the past couple weeks has told me I really need to change something.

So I have been reflecting the last couple hours trying to see what has caused this drop. From what I can tell it hasn't even been that past two downfalls but a lot of me just being lazy and doing more. I really need to stop feeling sorry for myself and what items had occurred. I need to remember I have gone through even rougher times and I have gotten myself out of some rough crap before. The whole fact is I hit a wall and I need to start pushing myself and get over that wall again.

Anyways, I have also seen that some of my major issues are trivial compared to others. I also know that I have had some major issues too. As many other post have showed I usually find a song that I can relate to and one song is Pearl Jam's "Sirens." The lyrics do talk about the fragile life and issues that happen and that one can not be knocked down by small problems because there is only a finite amount of life to live.


Until next entry...

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