One of my new years resolutions is to find myself. I am a person in reality, whatever I think reality is, but I want to find the true parts of me instead of what the culture around me wants me to be. I guess that can be a little confusing so what I want to find out is the true me, not the me that is defined by others. So in order to do this I have begun thinking about things I like to do. Once this list is created I want to try everything on that list and see what happens. Actually enjoy everyday instead of dreading a day. The past five years have been a struggle of me and conforming to others. I believe its time to let me win this time. I believe it is time to "do me". I have earned it in my opinion. I have graduated from a university, I have completed many years of work, I have survived hardship of the emotional types. It is time for me to let all of this stress go and it is time to move forward and relax. I think the next couple of weeks are going to be simply put amazing.
In yesterdays post I talked about the amount of stress that I am placing myself in and stretching myself so thin that I am actual feeling a real effect of it. I began to look at everything that I am doing and the hell that I am placing myself into which a very bad situation, one that could place my whole future in a hell. I am seeing that because I am trying to do so many things that I am actually being very shellfish and not doing the right thing. I have so much that is riding on me and yes I need to have fun, but I also need to remember there are other things that should be holding precedence over. Its time to get thing straight and see there is a definitive path in which I must follow to make sure my future at hand, the way it may happen won't be changed because of poor choices on my part. Its time to close one window, and begin to look out another to see a new view, picture, hope for the future.
Comments
Post a Comment